Bloody Laundry

Growing up, I read some books over and over. I don't even know how many times I read Hop on Pop or Me First or some of my favorite Goosebumps thrillers.

Another book I read repeatedly was called Scary Stories for Stormy Nights. As the title indicates, it's a collection of scary stories that I would read not only on stormy nights, but any time of day in any weather. While I enjoyed many of the stories, one was always the scariest for me... and that was "Bloody Laundry."

So the other day, I was bored and decided to make a movie. And when going through my books randomly, I happened to stumble upon Scary Stories for Stormy Nights. So I present to you my movie version of "Bloody Laundry"! I directed it and begrudgingly played a minor role (I hate acting!). Watch it 10 times (to increase the view count) and let me know what you think!

The Saturday Six

Welcome to The Saturday Six! In this entry, I'll talk about my six favorite things from this past week!

1. Veronica Mars

Since my favorite show ever is Buffy the Vampire Slayer, peepz always tell me that I should watch Veronica Mars, which is (obviously) not quite as brillz as Buffy, but similar to the show in that it features mystery, snappy one-liners, a blonde lead, and boyfriend issues. Last Monday I decided to watch the first episode... which turned into a 12 episode marathon. This show is fantastic!

I finished the first season last night and thought it was amazing. Smart, funny writing, complex and endearing characters (I love Keith Mars the most!), interesting mysteries that continually surprise... Much like a Kelly Osbourne album, this show has it all! I seriously laughed prox a million times, got teary-eyed a few times, and had to pick my jaw up from off the floor (where Solomon was scratching it and hissing at it) a few times. The only bad thing about the show is that I HATE the theme song. Terrible theme song or not, I can't wait to watch the rest of the seasons!

P.S. I feel even more drawn to this show because I graduated from Neptune High School, which is the name of the fictional school V. Mars attends!!

2. "E.T. (Futuristic Lover)"

In what might be the next single from Katy's highly-anticipated second album Teenage Dream, Ms. Perry sings says about her alien BF. Throughout the course of the song, she says she wants to be stunned with lasers and to be walk on her lover's wavelength and be there when he vibrates. LOVE IT.

3. Chocolate Dirt Ice Cream

You know how when you get ice cream cake, you force your self to eat the vanilla and chocolate ice cream when all you really want are the delicious crunchies in the middle of the cake?!

Well, this radio station I listen to on the way home from work decided to start selling ice cream called Chocolate Dirt, which is chocolate ice cream with the crunchies inside! Unfortunately for most of you, this ice cream is sold exclusively in these locations.

4. Clearance Sales!

I LOVE CHEAP/FREE THINGS. This week, I went to Target to buy the cheapest shirt possible because I was staying with a friend for the week and packed one shirt too few. So I went to the clearance section (duh) and bought this red plaid shirt...

FOR $4!!!! YAY! (And I know it's hot outside, but the shirt isn't thick and my office is freezing anyway.)

5. Jesus Camp

I FINALLY watched Jesus Camp this week and it was hilarious. Here's my favorite girl in the movie. Her name is Tory and she is so0o0o0o0o0o smart because she doesn't "dance of the flesh" and she doesn't believe in guys or girls!

“My favorite kind of music is like, Christian heavy metal, rock ‘n’ roll. It focuses and the basis is towards Jesus. And some of the songs don’t actually say like, ‘Jesus’ or ‘our lord’ or, and stuff like that. But they do have a Christian basis and it is focused towards him. So that’s why I like Christian. And, but, really, Britney Spears and like, Lindsay Lohan and some people like that, I could definitely care less about them. Because their main, their songs are mainly based on either like, guys or girls and we as Christians, I do not, well I, do not believe in that.”

6. Taco Dinners

Well, I actually haven't made tacos for dinner yet... But I'm heading over to Josh's right now to make some! MMMM.

We're All Precious

I am DYING to see Precious.

I first saw the trailer very early in the year after the film debuted at Sundance. It won the Grand Jury Prize for best drama as well as the Audience Award. And even more suprising in a way, actress Mo'Nique won a Special Jury Prize for acting!

The movie is about Precious, a young girl living in Harlem in the late 80s (aka, the time I was born!). Precious is abused by her father and is currently pregnant with his second child. The story follows Precious as she tries to cope with her abusive mother and school and all that. And basically it sounds really depressing which means I will LOVE IT!

Here are some reviews for it:
"The most unforgettable film I’ve seen . . . it is raw, electrically charged, heart-rending and completely shattering. . . . it’s a once-in-a-blue-moon experience that tests the boundaries of film, with an electrifying, positively Oscar-worthy performance by salty stand-up comic Mo’Nique, as the most monstrous mother on the planet." ~ Rex Reed New York Observer
"To simply call it harrowing or unsparing doesn’t quite cut it" ~ John Anderson Variety
"Raw, moving and somewhat akin to having a piano dropped on your head, Precious is a fable of abuse and redemption." ~ Liam Lacey Globe and Mail

Heart-rending?? Shattering?? Monstrous mothers? Unsparing? PIANOS ON THE HEAD?? Does this sound like my kind of movie or what?!

And I must mention one of the most interesting things about this movie.... Mariah Carey is in it!! And she is getting rave reviews. I know, you have to see it to believe it. But watch the video below and you will see that Mariah went the traditional 'go ugly for an Oscar' route. I hope she gets nominated just to shut everyone up about Glitter.



I predict some Oscar gold for Precious! If you aren't convinced yet, remember that Oprah endorses the film!

My twin Josh has already agreed to go with me ON OPENING DAY to see Precious. And if he cancels on me, I'm going alone! Can't wait!!

Oh, and I also wanna see Where The Wild Things Are. Besides from your sudden desire to see Precious, what movies are you looking forward to?

(P.S. I'm at work right now and our computer has no speakers. So I just watched the trailer with no sound and still knew exactly what they were saying the whole time! Yes, I've watched the trailer that many times.)

This Is Horror?

I'm constantly disappointed by horror films.
Well, I used to be. Lately, I've just not watched any because I can never find horror movies that actually scare me.

So my wuss friend Josh blogged about how frightening he found the Japanese horror film Audition. I'd heard about the film before and decided to watch to see if it was really as scary/disturbing/disgusting as everyone thought it was...

And it wasn't.

Now I did jump ONCE (in the scene photographed above) but I didn't think the last 15 minutes were creepy or horrific at all!
I don't want to ruin the film for anyone who hasn't seen it, but towards the end of the film, some Hostel-like gross stuff is supposed to happen. And it REALLY wasn't bad at all. Worse stuff happens in Misery!

But despite not being horrorfully fulfilled by the film, I didn't dislike it.

My favorite part was the actual audition.
Context: basically this hombre loses his wife and decides to hold auditions for a new wife. Well he pretends the audition is for a movie, but he is really judging the actresses on how well they will fill the role of his future wife.
I loved the questions the candidates were asked.

I was sad when the auditions came to an end...

Obviously I watched a version of the film with the most supreme subtitles.

My favorite subtitle appeared in an ad for the fake casting call that turned into wife auditions.
The woman reading the ad promises that if you show up to the casting call, you can be as famous as...

If I could get anywhere near Audery Hurpin's level of fame, I'd show up to the audition too!

Heartless Single Ladies

I've been meaning to do this post for so long but haven't been able to convert my VOB files from the DVD to any type of file recognized by Quicktime.
But finally I have! HandBrake ftw!

So last Saturday was The Goods at TCNJ!

The Goods is an all-day arts festival hosted by ink, the creative writing organization on campus, of which I am the secretary.

This year, we brought poet Matthew Rohrer.

I had to pick him up from the train station and was super nervous. I actually read this guy's books of poetry and now I'd be driving him to my school. I felt like saying, "I love 'Credo' and 'Childhood Stories'!" (two of his poems) but instead we just talked about Fleetwood Mac most of the time.

He was great and I recommend him to any fans of contemporary poetry.

Oh, and before Mr. Rohrer took the stage, I performed with my band José Jaime and the Best Valentine's Day Ever.

Our previous performances have included "See You Again" by Miley Cyrus, "Hot In Herre" by Nelly and "Womanizer" by Britney Spears.

So here are the videos of this semester's performances (watch with volume turned off for maximum pleasure).

First, we did a cover of one of my favorite Kanye West songs, "Heartless."
(For the dedication, just know that Jenna Mae is one of my good friends who is really mean to me.)



And then we had a little more fun with "Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It)."



I learned the lyrics to the bridge that morning, so I forgot them. Oops!

And why do I say "Umm" so much?! I need to take a public speaking class!

And The Best Actor Award Goes To....

It's no secret that I want to be famous.
I'd prefer to be a popstar that opens up for Britney one day, but I guess winning an Oscar would be OK too!

I've actually been acting for a long time! I starred in my high school's production of Bye Bye Birdie, various home movies and the personally acclaimed short film about drug addiction, Devil's Medicine. Oh, and I even had that very short stint on Project Runway before Richard Parker ruined my chances for Bravo stardom.

Well my latest film is currently being broadcast on my school's website! I'm one step closer to superstardom!!!

Watch here:

(and if you're only interested in my cameo, jump to 1:31 [or -3:28])

Finally.

We Can Make A Dance Floor Just Like A Circus

It's been exactly one week since Britney Spears blessed the world with her latest album, Circus. Album sales are still being calculated, but it seems like Brit will debut at number 1!
In celebration, I will share my experience of buying Circus.

On December 2, 2009, I woke up, eager to buy a physical copy of the CD I'd listened to for the past two weeks.

Even though I heard the CD for weeks through an internet leak, I still wanted the actual CD.

So off I went to Target.

I went over to the CD section and found the CD, in both standard and deluxe editions.

So of course I got the deluxe edition!

I mainly got it cause I wanted the sweet poster inside! After letting the poster flatten out, I put it on my wall, beneath a poster of The Killers!

As for the CD, I just listened and listened and listened.

Isn't it great?!

PS - Here's a video of me and my roommates performing "Womanizer" at an arts festival at my school! Sorry I sound so bad.

Edward Norton!

Yesterday I went to the movies with Shanique. We saw Edward Norton!!! I mean, The Incredible Hulk.


Shanique used my NEW phone to take a pic of me standing next to Mr. Norton. It had no shutter sound, so I didn't know when the pic was being taken, which is why I look so awkward.


I really enjoyed the movie! I think the Spider-man movies will probably be my favorite comic book inspired movie, but this movie was pretty good. I don't know why critics are complaining about the lack of character and story. I mean, there WAS a lot of action (which was interesting and well-choreographed) but the movie wasn't mostly action.

I think the Bruce Banner character was fleshed out. I felt for him. Oh wait, maybe I just wasn't paying enough attention to the story because Ed Norton was on the screen the whole time...


Then again, when it comes to characterization, Liv Tyler kind of got left out. She was just on the verge of tears and acting sympathetic the entire time. But seriously, we know we're seeing an action film. so we don't expect complexity to such a high degree in every character anyway.

I'm kinda upset about the 'feud' between Ed Norton and Marvel. Apparently Norton rewrote the script to add the lacking characterization that critics see, but his script was not used in the final product. I'd be mad too. But it's being said that he probably will not reprise the role in The Avengers movie. That sucks.

I think he should just meditate and think of how happy he'll make fans by returning...