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Sunday, February 21, 2010

Ghosts in the Attic: Polymorphism

Even though there are many advantages to being a human, I sometimes wonder how life would be if I were a different animal.

If I were a monkey... my rain forest home would probably be knocked down and I'd die...
If I were a duck... my lake would probably be polluted and I'd die...
If I were a deer... my forest would probably become a highway and I'd get run down by a crazy motorist who beeps his horn at me like it's my fault he's speeding...

Luckily, first grader Enrico didn't want to be any of those animals. Instead, he opted to be an animal that could hide away from the horrors of the world...

Entry dated May 7th, 1996

What animal would I
like to be. I would
like to be a turtle
be cause it is little
ny favite color and
can hide very good.

Aww! I remember when my favo animal was a turtle (this coveted spot was later taken by monkeys--green is still my favorite color).
But the part I find most fascinating about this entry is how my young self wished to be little so he could hide away... I guess that related to the fact that I was very shy as a child and never talked... How things have changed!

Oh, and are you absolutely terrified by that picture I drew? That turtle's head creeps me out!

Question Time!
If you could be an animal, which animal would you be?

33 comments:

Ryan said...

That's not a head. It's a trunk. Perhaps, you wanted to be a elephant turtle.

I suppose you are too young to have been influenced by TNMT.

john said...

How cute, you wanted to hide away. Clearly, you came out of your shell.

Ugh, had to be said.

I'd be an owl.

Polt said...

That's the turtle's head? It looks like a trunk! Sure you didn't wanna be an turtlephant?

HUGS...

Polt said...

Hmm, ya knot, my comment would have been a LOT more funnier if I had a)read the other comments before commenting and b)not used the same damn joke that Ryan did.

*SIGH*...okay, well, we all love you for your writing skills, not your drawing ablities anyways.

HUGS...

Jere Keys said...

I'm impressed at the grid-like uniformity of the turtle shell.

Garret of Jim and Garret said...

Yeah, that turtle is creepy. I think I would be a monkey. I like opposable thumbs too much.

that's J-O-S-H said...

Enrico: You & I both (loved what you & I spoke of!) wanted to hide away when we were little! I thought [read as: still think] that life is terrifying [feat. Katy Perry/Kara DioGuardi Showdown?!]!

Jere: Why do you never comment on my site anymore! Tear Central!

that's J-O-S-H said...

Oh...and to answer the question...I would want to be either a monkey, a MEGA SHARK, Steven the Beautiful or Baberz.

hoteltuesday said...

Ryan: I'm not too young for the original TMNT! In fact, the first time I ever went to the movies was to see the 1990 TMNT movie! Apparently I stood on my chair and was yelling the whole time!

john: I went through an owl-loving phase!!! If you were an owl you would eat bunnies!

Polt: You always should read the comments first. And I'm a great artist! (I'm gonna post some of my drawings soon.)

Jere: Thanks! (See Polt, someone appreciates my skillz)

Garret: I think 'monkey' is still my animal of choice. I love climbing trees and swinging about and yelling obnoxiously.

Josh: STEVEN THE BEAUTIFUL! HAHA! Good answer, good answer!

Justin said...

See, I *said* you had a topic for your blog!

Green is MY favorite color, too!!!! It's the best color! :-)

I'm not sure what animal I'd like to be. A dog, if I get an owner who spoils dogs as much as I do, and lets me sleep on the furniture; but not so much if I get the kind of owner who ignores me, or makes me live outside all the time, or is cruel to me.

Sometimes I've thought that being a bird might be cool. Being able to fly is a pretty neat idea. But I prefer fur (yes, you can make puntabuperv jokes about that and you wouldn't be wrong) so I think I'll stick with dog and hope karma gives me the right kind of owner. :P

Can I say I'm very proud of both Ryan and Polt for their (uncharacteristic) restraint in comparing the Turtle's nose to something as innocuous as a trunk? Not that I thought of any other organ. It really does look like a trunk. Really. :-)

Tam said...

Awwww. How sweet. Hiding away.

Hmmmmm. Maybe a koala bear. Cute and I just sit in a tree all day getting high and eating leaves.

Michelle M. said...

These journal entries are too adorable. I was thinking turtle/elephant too.

I guess I would be a cat. Then I could sleep/have my back rubbed all day.

Hm, What? said...

I'd probably be a dolphin. I think they're such beautiful animals, they mate for life with another dolphin, and plus - they like casual sex! Haha Jk (seriously, they do though) but that isn't one of the reasons why I'd like to be one haha.

Nathan V said...

Um, Orange is the best colour. Just saying. I liked it best before I even knew that I was Dutch, so it has to be awesome, right? It's too bad you can never wear it with black though. You just end up looking like Halloween.

Anyways, turtles live for a really long time, so it's a decent choice. If I had to be an animal I'd want to be something that could fly, so maybe a quezacotl?

Ryan said...

I'd be a Siberian tiger.

Polt: You can't beat me.

Justin: It looks prehensile, which would make non-trunk appendages . . . interesting.

Craig said...

I had a turtle named Murtle growing up. I was so original.

I'd be a llama.

Ryan said...

Craig is now officially a spitter.

David said...

May 7th, 1996 I was wrapping up my graduate degree. I guess by default I would be a D-I-N-O-S-A-U-R.

David said...

And I have no idea what TNMT stands for.

Ryan said...

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Craig said...

By Ryan's logic, can I change my answer to baby chick?

Ryan said...

Craig: You want to be a tiny pecker?

Anonymous said...

Oh Ryan: Enrico loved TMNT, he even had slippers, sneakers and pj's!! :o)

tj

Craig said...

LOL, I hate you Ryan. I was thinking more along the lines of:

http://i.ehow.com/images/GlobalPhoto/Articles/5484403/397168-main_Full.jpg

Chris D. said...

I think I wanted to be a dragon when I was little. I was probably inspired by Puff the Magic Dragon. I also had a stuffed dragon named Harold.

My favorite color is blue, however, I developed a fondness for green since it was a close friend's favorite color, and he had the most gorgeous green eyes.

Tam said...

Wow, Ryan was on his game for this one. LOL

Justin said...

Ryan, I don't get the "spitter" comment. Does it have something to do with llamas? (Obviously I get the raunchy gay reference; I just don't get what it was about Craig's comment that gave you that opportunity.)

Mind you, I *do* think it's funny that you made fun of Craig. Not just once, but twice! (Though poor Craig has been getting it from all sides today -- apparently he's also frighteningly pale.)

Oh, and yes. A prehensile organ would be ... a bit disturbing.

David, I was in graduate school from 84 to 87. If your dates make you a dinosaur, do mine make me a trilobite?

Chris. Why am I not surprised you'd be something as adorable as a dragon? Though honestly isn't Puff a bit before your time? I remember being taken by my father to a Peter Paul and Mary concert -- when that song FIRST CAME OUT. I was VERRRRRYYYYY young at the time; like 6 or something I think. I've always been very fond of dragons. :-)

Justin said...

Oh. And I'm going to start asking for pictures of Enrico in his Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle PJs on every subsequent comment I make on this blog.

I'm ***really*** hoping the pjs had feet. ;-)

Ryan said...

Justin: Llamas are notorious spitters. I believe that was what one of the teams immediately mentioned on The Amazing Race when they learned that they were going to work with llamas.

Justin said...

Ryan. Ah. Explained. I don't watch Reality TV. :P

(Though I have been known to glance at the screenshots of shirtless mens on squarehippies capped from shows like The Amazing Race....)

the naughty butternut said...

Hi there,

Naughty normally only stalks Josh's comment section, but she thought she'd try your comment section today :*)

Naughty never wanted to be an animal when she was a kid, but she did hide in the bathroom closet because it smelled like baby powder and it had a pull-string bulb in it. Once filtered through the upper shelves, the light was perfect for reading. Your post brought back that memory for some reason...Naughty's pretty sure no one knew she hid in the bathroom closet.

Green is also Naughty's favorite color. She loves J. Eugenides, and years ago she read lots and lots of John Irving. She doesn't get to read a lot of fiction any more...the last truly transcendent prose she read was Mark Helprin (His best is Winter's Tale.) I love the poetry of Billy Collins, Mark Strand, Wallace Stevens, and Pablo Neruda. I also like flipping back and forth between 1st and 3rd person when I stalk comment sections.

All best!

the naughty butternut

john said...

Enrico: See great minds think alike! Oh and as for bunnies, I do love them.

Anonymous said...

oh is that his head i thought it was his penis